Is there anything better than having a big celebration with friends and family on Thanksgiving? Yes sir. Absolutely crush a culinary rival before sitting down for this festival. That’s why I started a really friendly cooking competition this year Game informersResident Instagram chef Brian Shea. Of course I don’t have any cooking skills. Even the least flammable foods turn to fiery ashes as soon as I step into the kitchen. But that doesn’t matter, because I have a virtual ace up my sleeve.
I put Animal Crossing: New Horizons’ newly launched stove through its paces, growing crops, stealing techniques from villagers, and gathering all sorts of ingredients to make some delicious dishes. So instead of losing a fair fight that I was going to lose, I challenged my fellow editor to a battle between his real creations and my apparently superior New Horizons masterpieces (the secrets of which I am ready to share). I’ll leave it up to the reader to decide who gets the gold as we go through multiple courses, but I’m going to bet a million bells I know who wins.
Okay, first round. And right in front of the gates I’m already smoking the competition with a couple of mixed fruit sandwiches. Those street tacos aren’t a problem, I’ll admit, but the ingredients and teamwork put into my refreshing starter clearly comes through. Anyone looking to repeat my success should make friends with a culinary villager for the recipe. Also, it wouldn’t hurt to shake every tree you can find for an orange, a pear, and a peach. Oh, and put on your farming gear because you need wheat for this delicious, fluffy bread.
At this salad showdown, you can throw my competition’s lettuce straight in the trash, because my beet salad is unbeatable. Anyone who knows the stem market knows that the best and most valuable root vegetables come straight from Daisy Mae on a Sunday morning. What you may not know is that she gives her favorite customers the instructions for her secret beet dishes after a sale overnight. So if you want full purses and bellies, invest in this cash crop. You know Brian wishes he’d have.
I just found this delicious bread gratin recipe in a bottle on the beach, so it seems like fate would want me to win this side dish category. Hopefully the amber waves of cereal are plentiful in your wheat field, as this dish requires enough to make regular flour and its whole grain variety. But pound-for-pound gratin bread will give you a more satisfying cheesy bite than any macaroni. So who can complain about waiting days for Leif to finally sell wheat starters, or about the slow work of picking the harvests one by one when the final reward crushes my fellow editor?
Sometimes a perfect plate doesn’t need a lot of extra ingredients and effort. Case in point: Carpaccio di Marlin Blue. Sure, some cooks may prefer to cook their fish, place it over rice, and add some greens just to be safe. But for that upscale simplicity in your Animal Crossing kitchen, all you have to do is catch a blue marlin on the nearest pier, chop it up, and serve it that still tastes like the sea. And if you don’t hook the formidable sky-blue creature right away, you can always give the unwanted fish to other chefs so they can prepare junk meals.
With my roost sable biscuits for the dessert round, you can put a fork in this competition – and my rival’s waffle – because it’s done. It was a tough road to winning as I had to order coffee from Brewster for six days and drink each cup under the pressure of his judgmental gaze to convince the barista to give up the recipe. Either I’m feeling the thrill of victory right now or the copious amounts of caffeine paired with this winning sugar-and-flour-filled treat make my energies soar.
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